Finally

Finally, I got a chance to write for my blog again. I've just been so busy the past few days. Busy trying to lose weight. Hehehe. I usually just go for a a jog after work if the weather is nice or go to the gym if it's shitty outside. And by the time I get home, I barely have the energy to fix myself something to eat.

I also have a few recorded TV shows on my TIVO that are long overdue. I better start watching them coz I don't wanna run out of space for future recordings.

Lots of stuff are long overdue. I need to return a few phonecalls that should have been done 4 days ago. Chat with friends, brunch with a girl friend, dinner with a sweet couple. Emails that need replies. And the list goes on and on and on.

I am due for a hair trim, a manicure. Yeah right, like I really care about my nails. On second thought, maybe I should start caring about my nails. Hmmm, where's my nail clipper?

And I need to get my taxes done. That should be my priority since I know I am getting a refund. I could use a few extra hundred bucks, maybe pay off one of my credit cards or take myself to a shopping spree. Buy new clothes and other stuff.

Tonight, I am going to the gym for my weigh in and we'll see how much I lost in one month. My goal is to lose 4 pounds a month so we'll see how I did for this month.

So that's about it. Nothing really special at the moment. Just a bunch of run-on sentences and grammatically incorrect phrases that pretty much capture this wonderful life of mine.

Morning Calls

It's so nice to wake up to his voice every morning. I always wake up with a smile when I hear my phone ring because I know it would be him. He wakes me up and asks me if I slept good the previous night. He calls to tell me, "wake up beautiful." Hehe I love it. It tickles me inside! He calls to tell me he loves me and even though he says it a lot, when he says "I love you" again it never fails to make me smile and feel so good inside.

There is nothing like waking up to his voice.

Stuff Like This

D called and asked me when was the last time we saw each other. So I said last night. He said he misses me a lot and it feels like he hasn't seen me since last year! You know, things like this makes me fall in love with him over and over again. Stuff like this makes me all warm inside! Damn.

Last night, he also gave me a coffeemaker. I don't have one so he brought me one that I could use so I could brew myself some coffee in the morning before I go to work. I thought it would be perfect when my mother gets here too. She's addicted to coffee so I'm sure she's gonna love it!

Thanks D for everything that you do for me and for everything that you are. You are the best babe!

In Behalf of A Good Friend

I am posting this in behalf of a very good friend... because I know she won't post it on her own. :)

I Can't Be Your Friend Anymore (click Title to listen to the song)
Tim Rushlow

This might come as quite a shock
But I’ve given it a lot of thought
This thing that’s come between us can’t be ignored
I’ve taken all I can
And this is where it’s gotta end
Cause I can't be your friend anymore

And I can’t be accused
Of not being there for you
How many nights have you shown up at my door
I hope you understand
That this wasn’t in my plans
But I can’t be your friend anymore

And it’s killing me to know you
Without having a chance to hold you
And all I want to do is show you
How I really feel inside
You can run to me, you can laugh at me
Or you can walk right out that door
But I can’t be your friend anymore

So baby now it’s up to you
Do I win or do I lose
Will my heart fly or lie broken on the floor
Well, take me as I am
Cause I wanna be your man (woman)
But I can’t be your friend anymore

And it’s killing me to know you
Without having a chance to hold you
And all I want to do is show you
How I really feel inside
You can run to me, you can laugh at me
Or you can walk right out that door
But I can’t just be friends anymore

We can’t be just friends, anymore

Feeling Bad

I am really feeling bad that D had to deal with the hormonal side effects I am going through. I am really trying my best to wrestle with it but sometimes it just gets bad that I succumb to it.

I'm really sorry D.

I know I am so lucky that D is understanding and so supportive the whole time but I know that doesn't give me the license to just succumb to whatever emotional shit my hormones are causing me. I have to be stronger than this. I have to exercise my power to control it. And D is right. Since I know what it's all about, I should be strong enough to control it. It's just weird though. I know I'm not the only woman out there that's experiencing this but I just hope that this would wear out soon.

And like D said, "This will pass." I just have to keep reminding myself that.

Another Surprise

Just when I thought I was already the luckiest woman on earth, D surprised me again with something that really made me love him deeper, wider, higher.

He picked me up from my place tonight and asked me to bring my IPOD with me. I gave him a puzzled look and asked him "Why?" He said just bring so I did. When we got to his car, there was an Apple bag sitting on the passenger seat! I already knew what it was when I saw it! He got me a Monster IPOD FM Transmitter so I could play my music in my car!

My God! I was so overwhelmed with his thoughtfulness. Sure, I was already overwhelmed of how thoughtful it was for him to buy me Dash. But he just keeps surprising me! He knew I really wanted an FM transmitter. I bought one before but i had to return it because it was a piece of crap. So he mentioned he was gonna but me one. But when he went to Fry's they didn't have any. So like Dash, buying an FM transmitter slipped off my mind. So it was really a big surprise when he gave me a way better FM transmitter tonight.

I am really thankful that destiny brought D and I together. He's so thoughtful, so caring, so understanding. He's everything. I feel so spoiled right now but I hope that I would be able to reciprocate in every way that I can.

I love you baby. :) Thank you so much.

Another Random Quote

"Most of us miss out on life's big prizes. The Pulitzer. The Nobel. Oscars. Tonys. Emmys. But we're all eligible for life's small pleasures. A pat on the back. A kiss behind the ear. A full moon. An empty parking space.A crackling fire. A great meal. A glorious sunset. Hot soup. Cold beer. Don't fret about copping life's grand awards. Enjoy its tiny delights. There are plenty for all of us." - Ken Dye

Different People, Different Dreams

I was talking to an old friend a few days ago, someone I only see once in great while. She's a great friend of mine, my best friend since we were 12 years old. And we may not see each other that often but when we do, it always feels like old times. We sit and talk and laugh just like we did in the past. And last time I was at her house, we talked about the past, reminiscing the way we were, recounting lost first loves and rehashing our dreams.

She reminded me of her goals and dreams when we were in highschool. She always dreamt of being married by the time she turns 26 and have a baby by her 27th birthday. And she did. She got married when she was 26 and gave birth to a healthy baby boy 2 months before she turned 27. She said she is happy and contented although she feels like she missed out on so many things in life.

I was looking around her house, a home she and her husband lovingly built together with a little boy darting from the family room to the living room asking my friend for an ice cream cone. I listened to her recount her highschool dreams and feeling happy that she is now living those dreams.

Then I realized something. I realized that back in highschool, I never dreamt of white picket fences. I wasn't like my best friend. I don't remember setting a timeline on when I wanted to have a baby. In fact, I never dreamt of having a baby. I never dreamed of having a nice house in the 'burbs with a big backyard and a swing with a loving husband, kids and a black lab. Of course I dreamed of owning a house but not like the way my best friend did. And don't get me wrong. I love kids and I have spent the last 9 years of my life helping them. And who knows, maybe someday, I'll start dreaming of having my own too.

But I am only 28 years old and I am still chasing my dreams.

Instead of dreaming about babies and husbands, I was dreaming of a charitable foundation I would set up for orphans and street children. I even drew a "floor plan" on how it would look like and how the whole Center would be landscaped. While she was set on getting married at 26, I was busy dreaming of publishing a book, of becoming a songwriter, of travelling the world. I was busy dreaming of becoming a lawyer who would defend the rights of those who can't afford exorbitant fees of an attorney.

Yes, I eventually got married, too early I should say, but now, I am free from that oppressive shackles called marriage. And now I am back on track, happily chasing my dreams again.

My best friend and I are two different people with different set of dreams.

Husband Mart

Here's a joke I came accross this morning and I thought I'd share it with you guys...

"A store that sells husbands has just opened where a woman may go to choose a husband from among many men. The store is composed of 6 floors, and the men increase in positive attributes as the shopper ascends the flights. There is, however, a catch. As you open the door to any floor you may choose a man from that floor, but if you go up a floor, you cannot go back down except to exit the building.

So a woman goes to the shopping center to find a husband.

The first floor sign reads: Floor 1 - These men have jobs. The woman reads the sign and says to herself, "Well, that's better than my last boyfriend, but I wonder what's further up?"

So up she goes. The second floor sign reads: Floor 2 - These men have jobs and love kids. The woman remarks to herself, "That's great, but I wonder what's further up?"

And up she goes again. The third floor sign reads: Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love kids and are extremely good looking. "Hmmm, better" she says. "But I wonder what's upstairs?"

The fourth floor sign reads: Floor 4 - These men have jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking and help with the housework. "Wow!" exclaims the woman, "very tempting. BUT, there must be more further up!"

And again she heads up another flight. The fifth floor sign reads: Floor 5 - These men have jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking, help with the housework and have a strong romantic streak. "Oh, mercy me! But just think...what must be awaiting me further on?"

So up to the sixth floor she goes. The sixth floor sign reads: Floor 6 - You are visitor 3,456,789,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at Husband Mart get the hell out of here and have a nice day. "

I Won't Trade Him For Anything

What is up with the new Nintendo DS that all stores in the metropolitan Bay Area are out of stock? I think they have been out of stock since early December. D needed to buy one today so I called Costco, Circuit City, Ebgames, and GameStop all over the Bay Area but they were all out of stock and I was told that they are getting more by Thursday. I called a few Best Buy locations but they didn't have it neither until finally, I called Best Buy in Pittsburg and yes, they have it! Maybe it's because Pittsburg is kind of in the outskirts of the Bay already, I don't know. I'm just happy that D got what he needed.

Then while I was driving home, he mentioned he had something for me and that he left it on top of my stairs. I was surprised! I mean, I haven't even seen what it was and I was already melting in my car. So after working out, I rushed home and I saw this bluish plastic bag and I realized it was a Disney Store bag. And I went, "Oh my God!" It's Dash!!!!!!!! I was screamin and laughing and jumping and twirling. Man, I felt like a kid again! I immediately called D and left a message on his voicemail. I think I must have been screaming with glee when I left the message.

See, I totally fell in love with Dash, one of the characters in "The Incredibles." He's that little boy that dashes everywhere, hence the name Dash. He was so cute and so adorable and I can't forget that scene where he and his mom and sister fell from their aircraft down to the ocean while on a mission to rescue their father. He was floating on the water and screamed, "We're dead! We're dead!" And the way he said it was so funny and the way he shook his head was just hilarious. So in December, I told D I really wanted Dash as a Christmas present. I wanted him so bad that D looked everywhere for him but it seemed like all Disney Store was sold out. I was even willing to settle for those tiny little plastic figurines that you get from a dispenser. But the thing is, we already tried putting 4 quarters in a toy dispenser at the Metreon but we didn't have luck. D and I got Dash's mom the first time and his sister the second time. So we gave up.

Then out of the blue, D stoppped by my place to surprise me with a Dash plush stuffed toy! God, how thoughtful of him! The moment I held the toy in my hands, I just wanted to kiss and hug D for being so sweet and so thoughtful. But he wasn't there so I'll save it all for next time I see him. :)

I am really happy right now, not because I got Dash following me around the house but because I am so lucky to have the most thoughtful and the most loving man on earth. And no, I won't trade him for anything!

and for D:

"Thank you so much baby! That was mighty sweet of you and really, really thoughtful. I am so touched! You knew how bad I wanted to have a Dash toy and you took the time to get it for me. That just totally blows me away. You're the best babe! I wuv you.... more!"

and below is a picture of my Dash...

This is Dash :)

Of Workouts and Weight Loss

I've been too tired late at night to write something for my blog. I have been working out hardcore and when I get home, I am usually too exhausted to sit on the computer and write down my thoughts. So I've been keeping my thoughts and the mundane activities of my life to myself lately.

But hey, working out and watching my food intake (I refuse to call it diet) is paying off. I haven't been eating rice or bad carbs in any form since New Year's Day and I have been working out for an hour or more almost every day. And guess what, i've lost 6 lbs. already! Yay! And there's no stopping me.

Yesterday, I tried a pair of pants I haven't worn in a looooong time because they were too tight on me. I was scared to try them on coz they might fail my expectation but damn, I slid into them perfectly! Wow! I looked at myself on my full length mirror and damn I looked good in them! Okay, I know I'm boasting but who wouldn't! After losing 6 lbs. in 1o days (without any pills - just eating right and ahrd core exercise), nothing could stop me from boasting! Please bear with me through this phase. I really need this extra boost of self-confidence. Of course other people won't be able to tell right away, and to them I might look like I'm still as overweight as I was 10 days ago but those pair of pants don't lie! They fit! End of story. Hehehe

Anyway, I didn't get a chance to workout today. I came home and cooked a healthy meal for myself and D. I need to take a rest day anyway so today was my rest day. My body needs to recuperate. I've been working out hardcore and I really need my body to rest. So I made stir-fried vegetables - Waves style, grean peas, cabbage, mushrooms, shrimps and fried eggs cut into strips sauteed in olive oil, garlic and a little chicken broth and a dash of teriyaki sauce. It's just something that I made up. And D liked it! He was impressed! Actually, I was a little surprised at how good it turned out. So we enjoyed our healthy meal sans carbs, a little wine and a piece of brownie and vanilla ice cream for D. I baked brownies for him tonight coz I know he likes to munch on them when he gets home. So he had some for dessert and I had 0 carbs Neopolitan Ice Cream. I'm sure D's dessert tasted way better than mine but I was exercising my self-control. And I like the fact that I was strong enough to resist the urge to have a bite of his brownie and vanilla ice cream. How can I not be strong when I've already 6 lost lbs.? :)

So. I'm gonna finish this entry right about now get my gym clothes ready for tomorrow so I can go straight to the gym after work, hit the sack and hoping to be up and running by 8:30 tomorrow morning.

Ciao.

Have You Ever Been In Love?

At this moment, I am listening to the song, "Have You Ever Been In Love" by Celine Dion. And at this moment, tears are flowing from my eyes. No, it's not because I am sad. It's just because I realized that my answer to all the questions in this song is "Yes." It's all because I am blessed with a wonderful man. All because D found me. All because D showed me what real love is all about.

Yes, I have been in love. Yes, I have touched the moonlight. My heart's shooting stars and I've held heaven in my arms.

Yes, I've walked on air and I've felt like I was dreamin' the very first night we met and his lips lightly brushed mine. And it really felt so good.

I've spent a long time waiting for something that was heaven-sent.

Yes, I have said a prayer and now that it's answered all my hope has been restored. No, there's no need for me to look anymore. He found me and brought me to a place that I ain't leavin'. Somewhere I'm gonna stay.

I have finally found the meaning. I finally know how it feels to be in love.

Yes, there is no doubt, I have been in love. And I still am.

....0....0....0.....0.....

Have You Ever Been In love
Celine Dion

Have you ever been in love
You could touch the moonlight
When your heart’s shooting stars
You’re holding heaven in your arms
Have you ever been so in love

Have you ever walked on air
Ever felt like you were dreamin’
When you never thought it could
But it really feels that good
Have you ever been so in love

Have you ever been in love
You could touch the moonlight
When your heart’s shooting star
You’re holding heaven in your arms
Have you ever been in love, have you...

The time I spent
Waiting for something that was heaven-sent
When you find it don’t let go,
I know

Have you ever said a prayer
And found that it was answered
All my hope has been restored
And I ain’t looking anymore
Have you ever been so in love, have you...

Some place that you ain’t leavin’
Somewhere you’re gonna stay
When you finally found the meanin’
Have you ever felt this way

The time I spent
Waiting for something that was heaven-sent
When you find it, don’t let go,I know...

Coz have you ever been so in love, so in love
You could touch the moonlight
You can even reach the stars
Doesn’t matter near or far
Have you ever been so in love

Have you ever been in love
Have you ever been in love
So in... love...

Waste of Time and Money

So my boss asked me this morning to go to a meeting at 1 p.m. today. I told him I have an appointment at 2 p.m. with 2 clients but he insisted I go to the meeting and just leave around 2 o'clock. He said it was really important. It was an audit meeting blah, blah with someone from the Dept. of Labor national office.

I really didn't want to leave the office coz it's raining outside and I have shell out money for parking in downtown SF. But I had to go. I had to follow orders. Sigh, I can't wait to be the one giving orders.

So I was sitting there with 11 other people that I work with and the auditor/evaluator/analyst when she said that my presence and the presence of 3 other coworkers are not needed. She wasn't evaluating my site at the moment. I was a little pissed at my boss for messing this all up. I had to go out in the rain, pay a $5 parking fee at the parking garage and might miss an appointment with a client - all this for nothing. So instead of going back to the office I decided to take a longer lunch. I went to Good Frickin Chicken on Mission St. for lunch. Yes, they have good freakin chicken there so I sat down and enjoyed my lunch while looking out the window watching the pouring rain. This is something I don't get to do everyday. I usually bring my lunch or go down to a store close to my office, bring something back and eat it in the office. But this time, I leisurely ate my lunch and enjoyed every bite of my Good Frickin Chicken chicken.

D is coming over later and I can't wait. I am so in love with him that I go to bed at night hugging my pillow, smiling on the thought that someone out there loves me and adores me. It's the best feeling in the world.

Later.

My IPOD Is My Gym Buddy

I can't believe I spent an hour doing cardio on the elliptical machine tonight! Thanks D for giving me a gym partner - my IPOD. It made an hour cardio seem like 30 minutes. It was awesome having my whole music library with me! I'm also stoked on the new set of headphones that D got for me. They're really awesome! I have no more complaints about the sound quality of the IPOD. After trying the headphones D gave me, I realized it's just the crappy headphones that came with the IPOD that was making the sound horrible. No more complaints D. Thanks so much for the headphones. They rock!

I also went to Blockbuster and rented Collateral and Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle. I've yet to watch Collateral but Harold and Kumar wasn't as funny as I thought it would be. It was a bit entertaining but nothing really funny about it.

Ok, I gotta do some catching up on my TIVO stuff. I'm gonna watch Rebel Millionaire and 2 episodes of House, MD.

Later guys.

A Random Thought

To all the girls out there right now having a tough time in relationships:

"Never lose the love you have for yourself. It IS possible to love another completely, and still love yourself. We are born alone, we die alone, and if we can share the joy of life with people along the way, we should count ourselves lucky. "

-just a random thought I came accross online today.

Hello Picture Uploader

Has anybody tried Hello uploader? The two pictures below were uploaded through Hello and it seemed like the picture quality decreased significantly. Is it Hello or is it just me?

More Fallen Leaves

More fallen leaves on my stairs.
copyright 2005 Waves

A fallen leaf on my stairs.

2nd Day of the Year

Rain kept pouring so I decided to just stay in, put my coziest pj's on and have a movie marathon. I managed to finish 3 movies and that was after finally getting up at midday.

I watched Behind Enemy Lines then I decided to make a quick run to Blockbuster to exchange 2 of my movies. I picked Bourne Supremacy which I have already seen in the theaters but I wanted to test it with my surround sound at home and I also got Stepford Wives which was an okay movie.

Tomorrow, I'm back to the same old routine. Work-gym-home. Or maybe gym-work-home depending on how lazy I get when I wake up in the morning. Hopefully, by the end of the year, I will be 50 lbs lighter than I am now. Yes, that is my goal and it's my resolution to eat healthy and to workout consistently. Eating healthy means less of the bad carbs and workoing out consistently means I will go to the gym at least 5 times a week and do cardio for at least 45 minutes. Thanks D for the -IPOD Photo you gave me for Christmas. It will be my constant gym companion and yep, I already made a playlists of my favorite workout music that will surely make my workout time fly.

This year, I decided I wanna take care of myself. I seriously decided I wanna focus on my health coz I am getting older (cringe) and I only have one life to live.

So now, I'm off to bed. Gotta get enough sleep so I have enough energy to workout hardcore tomorrow.

The City on New Year's Day

View of San Francisco from the Berkeley Marina on New Year's Day

New Year's Day

Today, I fell in love again. I fell in love with D all over again. It's hard for me to explain the way I feel coz I am just overwhelmed with so much love for him. I gazed at him as I listened to the beating of his heart and I can't help but say a little prayer, thanking God for bringing him into my life. He wrapped his arms around me as I rested my head on his shoulder and feelings of love and security just washed over me.

No, life can't get any better than this.

God, what a wonderful way to start my new year.